MONDAY SEPTEMBER 15

Good evening. I am downstairs in the Haog Resource Center and I thought I would blog while I waited for Dr. Barth to come to see us. I walked down here to place an order for some prescriptions for my Mom and I will give you a picture of what my journey down 8 flights in a crowded elevator looked like.

I am dressed in my pretty pink skirt and long sleeved white top and I have black comfy slippers on. No make-up. I have my phone with my head set in the same hand as the 2 prescription bottles. Tucked under my arm is my Mac and in my left hand is my "Red Cup". Do you think the salt around the rim gives it away? :) I am ready to relax, huh?

Gary was sleeping and today has been a hard day. I would venture to say that the entire weekend has been pretty hard on Gary. He has had loads of sciatic pain. His fever has been 103 and then he fell to 93. His blood pressure was all over the place. He had bouts of incredible sweats and shivering.

I guess the chemo he got on Saturday has not caused any real issues yet with the exception of one. Today, I was rubbing his head and face and his hair was falling out in clumps. It was very hard because this is the first time this has happened. It is yet another thing that makes cancer very real and right in your face. It is a very emotional thing to watch the person you love and adore lose all of his/her hair. He is not only losing it on his head and face but all over his body.

The kids went to Nine Star on their way up here and bought him a beanie. They actually got him a really cool beanie (their sense of impeccable taste comes from me obviously) so that his head would not get cold. They came tonight and brought the electric razor and we all shaved his head together as a family. We shaved his face too and tomorrow I will take a Bic and shave all the stubble that is left over off. For some reason it is very sad that we have shaved his head BECAUSE we have to not because he wants to.

He has barely eaten anything in 2 days and the pain in his leg is overwhelming. We had a meeting with Dr. Gluzman today and he will meet with Dr. Barth about the next step in hopefully controlling his pain.

I started to research Gary's funky symptoms from the weekend and stumbled upon information concerning thyroid, adrenal gland and pituitary functions. I have talked with the internal med doc today to see about getting some blood work done to either rule out or confirm that one of these things could be causing Gary's fluctuating fevers/non-fevers, blood pressure changes and hoarseness in his voice among other symptoms. I think they will draw the blood tomorrow and we should know something in the next couple of days.

My Mom has been HUGELY helpful with the boys. I know 3 boys is a lot of work when you are not used to dealing with small kids but she is doing a great job! Love you Mom.

I must thank all of you once again for all of your love and caring cards and thoughts and prayers and gifts and CD's and buttons and movies and everything else! We love all of you and thank you for your incredibleness (is that even a word?).

I have to go now and get back to my man. Pray for me that he has a better night that is more restful and peaceful. Pray for Dr. Gluzman and Dr. Barth as they try to figure out what to do next with Gary's pain management. If we could manage the sciatic pain EVERYTHING would change possibly for Gary. He would not be so hyper-focused on that pain and he could get focused on healing and walking and getting outta here!

Love to you all and have a great night!
L