Stimulators and Survivors

BEANIE SURPRISES ADDRESS CHANGE

GARY SALLEE
C/O Mountainview Church
26131 Marguerite Parkway, Suite B
Mission Viejo, CA 92692

If you wish to send Gary a beanie to celebrate his birthday on November 9th please either send it to our home address if you have it or to our church address listed above. I had originally listed the PO BOX and that is fine but some companies I am told (if you are ordering online) will not send to a PO BOX - so there!

I am sad to tell you that the stimulator has not worked yet. We spent the better part of an hour trying to dial it in and we thought we had it BUT evidently we did not. We were in Dr. Barth's office after we programmed it and one second Gary was fine and just like that he was in excruciating pain - unexplainable pain. He says that the pain is not like the regular pain he has and it is not like the pain the electrical impulses sometimes give him. That is as far as he could pinpoint it at this time. So, we turned it off and gave him IV Dilaudid and have called it a day with the stimulator.

I called Justin (Boston Scientific Rep) and he is at a loss for a solution at this time. I think what we will do is try again tomorrow at a very low impulse and see how it goes from there. It might just take some time to figure it all out. Justin was able to get everything covered as far as the pain goes with the stimulator with the exception of anything below the left or right knee. He can't quite figure that out either but I am hopeful that in a few days time we will get this thing working for Gary to get him some much needed relief.

The Cancer Center was JAM PACKED today! Wow! The most crowded I have ever seen it. We got to see all of our regular friends and Dr. Barth has brought in a new nurse! We are so excited because Rachel is one of our most favorite nurses from Hoag on the 8th floor. She has been so wonderful to Gary and to me and the boys and we were so happy to see her there! Dr. Barth knows a great nurse when he sees one!

Cancer is a bitch (sorry it is). We have met so many people in so many different stages of this awful disease but let me tell you something. You will never meet a greater group of people. The people we meet are courageous and strong. We are like one big family. We all talk and support eachother. It doesn ot matter if you have bladder cancer or lung cancer of if you are Stage IV or Stage I. Everyone in that office - patients and their family members - are all there for the same reason - to be there for one another. Ttrust me when I tell you that I am not a support group type of person. I have never been one to find any comfort or peace from getting together with other people in the same boat. This is different. Everyone simply supports one another and talks and shares stories and we all share our lives! It is an honor and a privilege to be a part of these peoples lives. These people are true warriors and heros!

I often wonder if this is what I should be doing - working with cancer patients. I could go back to school and be a nurse. I hear it is super difficult for people to get into any nursing program but maybe I should eventually try. It is my hearts desire to help people who are sick to smile and laugh and find the bright spots even through the dark days. I know many of the patients and nurses have done that for both Gary and for me. What a wonderful thing. Maybe someday......

So far the kids have gone to so many Halloween parties and Birthday parties over the past few days that I have truly lost track. I do know that Nate went to a party and came home with a big bruise and abrasion on the right side of his face. Jax came home tonight after a kid kicked him in the face at Scooters Jungle and he has a big red mark next to his right eye. So far Zach is in the clear although he has the whole stitches thing going on.

I have a sucher removal kit and tomorrow Gary and I will help Zach remove his stitches. He is super excited that we are "McGyvering" it at home. I guess that would be cool as a kid to be able to tell people that you took your own stitches out! We will see how brave he is tomorrow.

I have Jax's Parent Teacher Conference tomorrow morning at the crack of dawn and I am anxious to see how he is doing. I met a little girl from his class this weekend who told me that Jax was one of the quietest students in the class and that he always gets their group extra marbles because he helps everyone and he is just great! Are we talking about my Jax? He is a great kid and I do see glimpses of this behavior at home but "glimpses" pretty much sums it up for me. All the time? Really? If that is true than Iwe will be setting some higher expectations at home!

Nate was a huge helper today as we "stomached" through Walmart. Get In and Get Out is my motto. If the prices weren't so cheap I would never go there. But, when the price is right, the price is right and so I go kicking and screaming and praying I get a fast checker and get the heck out!

Oh - Gary had 2 of the 4 chemo drugs today. He has the lesser 2 of the 4 evils. He will get them both again next Monday and then the yucky ones the following Monday. So, we hopefully have a break from the hospital for a while and as of right now we do not have to be back at Barth's office until Thursday to check in and get his counts taken! Yeah. I will go to the conference and come home and go back to bed. I need all the sleep I can get. I am playing serious catch up right now.

Well, it is 8 PM and I am off to bed. Gary and I used to do this all the time. We got the boys to bed at 7:30 and then we crawled into bed to experience evenings of peace and quiet - the only time we would get that throughout our day. I do have to get up at 10 PM to administer another one of Gary's antibiotics. Then, if all goes well I can fall into a deep slumber until morning (now that is a wonderful dream!)

The boys are out of school early and I love the light homework load this week.
I hope everyone is planning something really fun for Halloween. There are so many people who are Anti-Halloween and to each his own. I personally love it! It is the only time of year that your neighbors actually open their doors, smile and say hello, give the kids candy, and tell them how cute or scary or awesome they look! I LOVE IT and the kids have so much fun. I can't wait to see their excitment.

Gary has a request. He has a favorite Bible verse that means a lot to him and he wants everyone to read it.

John 3:16
"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son,that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

While on Bible Gateway I found this verse of the day and I wanted to share it with all of you, too.

Hebrews 4:12
“For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.”

I have not had the best attitude lately. I told you all how frustrated and grumpy I have been. I finally got to the point where I asked God to take it away from me because I truly do not want to feel like that. He absolutely took that away from me and then I read this verse which references the attitudes of the heart. I want my attitude to always be in tune with what God wants to see from me. So, it takes these gentle reminders that God has left for us to make you realize what it is that He wants from us. My heart was so full of repentance and I am thankful that I can see these things in myself and try to change them with His guidance.

I bid you all goodnight.
Sleep well and be rested.
Love and Hugs (and Smiley Faces all the way around),

L & G (he gets the nod because he contributed tonight! :) Go Gary!!!!