Gary

Good Evening! It is Tuesday evening and I was finally able to get to the hospital to see Gary today. Yesterday was a long day and I had appointments, paperwork to sift through, things to do with the kids and snack bar schedules to complete!

From all accounts of how Gary was doing yesterday I knew he was not well. He basically was nonresponsive and was in and out of it. He does not have much recollection of yesterday when we finally were able to speak today. Dr. Barth came in last night and made it clear that Gary was way too drugged up and that he needed him and wanted him to be coherent. So that brings us to today.

Stacy and Cris were with Gary a good part od the late morning and early afternoon. I came around 2 PM and Gary was awake and we had great conversation for the first time in about 4 days. He was alert and he and I watched Brian Regan and we laughed our butts off! I gave him a bath and covered him with lotion. We took care of brushing his teeth and putting cologne on! He is still having a tremendously hard time walking but can manage to make it with a walker from the bed to the bathroom (about 5 feet). It is so hard to see him struggle to walk that short distance.

Gary is having radiation every day and he is starting to feel some of the effects of this new chemo regimen. It is hard for him to swallow so he really can't eat. Besides, everything he puts in his mouth kinda tastes like metal! He feels like he has sores in his mouth and that his mouth is covered with a film. He does not have any sores and I see no film but the nurse is having him use a special mouth rinse to prevent the sores from appearing. These are all common side effects from the chemo. I managed to get him to eat some chocolate pudding and drink some ice tea. He ate half of a Togos sandwich that Malcolm had brought him for lunch the day before but it ended up really hurting his throat so he had to stop.

So, I hope and pray that tomorrow is a better day as well. He is in a little more pain than he has been in but it does not take a rocket scientist to figure out that of course you will be in less pain if you are drugged out of your mind every day!

Infuriating conversation with the nurse is as follows:

Gary, what is your pain level?
(from out of a DENSE DENSE DENSE fog Gary responds by saying an 8 1/2.) Take in mind that he is not moving other than to violently jerk his extremities!
Wow, an 8 1/2 she says. I am looking at your pain pump and you have not pushed it in 7 hours. How can you be an 8 1/2 when you are not using your pump to help control the pain?
DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH - (this is what I am thinking)
How in God's name do you expect Gary to use his pain pump when he is DRUGGED OUT OF HIS MIND 24/7? He can barely move with the exception of the insane involuntary jerking movements his body makes BECAUSE of the incredible amounts of pain meds he is getting orally. These meds do not take the pain away as described by the level of 8 1/2 he was at but they obviously take him to another world so that he can't be as in touch with his pain.
I am not being unkind or mean but it seems ridiculous that Gary would even be asked that question.

Another hospital annoyance.
Gary's IV needs something because it is beeping and beeping and beeping. We call the nurse. Can you please come in and service the IV because it is beeping? OKAY they say.
5 minutes beep beep beep 10 minutes BEep BEep Beep 20 minutes BEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEP We are both going crazy listening to this thing. She enters FINALLY!

Gary without missing a beat asks her where she has been becuase we called her a LONG time ago and she never responded. Would she want to be feeling like absolute and utter crap confined in a roomlistening to a LOUD machine beeping in her ear second after second for 20 minutes. I think not!

Overall, the hospital is great (minus the $6.95 charge to watch TV every day). The nurses have been great and Dr. Barth is great. Dr. Kim is his radiologist and he is super nice. The food lacks but they have a great cafeteria.

Okay, I am done venting. On to a funny kid story.

A friend from school informs me that one of my kids has taught her kid how to stick her tongue out, grab the end of her tongue, pull it and say the word "apple" and "firetruck". I can see that many of you will attempt this feat just to see what it sounds like. Trust me when I tell you that it is not "truck" or "apples" for that matter. My child? Are you kidding? Not my kid. No way. RIGHT! I am no dummy!
I ask him where he has learned this and he tells me from older kids. Neat, huh? I chuckled a little because I can remember thinking that was funny in school. :) Inappropriate but funny nonetheless.

Thank you to Tami R. and Wendy M. for planning a great night at the nail salon tonight. Our church has so many fun friends and I always have a great time fellowshipping with them all. I love meeting new friends and catching up with old. I hope that Tami and Wendy plan some more events for fellowship in the near future! It is fun to just hang out and be girlfriends! I suggested taco Tuesday 1X a month at Tortilla Flats on the Lake. They have the yummiest $1 tacos!

I also wanted to thank the Women's Ministry for making all the beautiful flower arrangements for my house and for putting together my hospital bag full of essentials! I am so grateful and they were so thoughtful.

Thank you for all of your cards and notes and gifts and thoughts and love! All of your cards are hanging on Gary's hospital walls right now and there are also posters and letters and stuft animals and flowers! His room is festive and that is how it should be.

I have to get to bed! I have a super busy day tomorrow as I am sure the rest of you do! Gary, having the life of Riley, can be in his bed, get up anytime he wants and watch the guys surf and gaze at the ocean and just loaf all day! Ha Ha!! I joke often with him because our dream house would have an ocean view and he wanted that view so bad that he had to go and get cancer just to get it! Geez! :) I know working is a monotonous task but cancer to get out of it? Really Gary. There are easier things to do to accomplish the goal of not working! :) Love you honey!!!

It is our 12th anniversary on Saturday and I am not sure what we will do Saturday afternoon to celebrate it. Maybe we can have some take out if he is able to swallow by then! He really wanted to be able to take me out to dinner. I told him that when he comes home we can plan something then.

PRAYER & PRAISE
We are expecting his counts to drop soon. He will more than likely need a transfusion and his white cells might dip very low. Keep praying that maybe this won't happen and he will stay strong.

Pray that Dr. Barth can get his pain under control so that we can get him strong enough to come home!

Pray that the treatments are beginning to help Gary by killing the bad cancer cells.

Praise to God that my Mom is here to help and that Gary's parents were here to help. My Aunt''s are able to help care for my Nan so that my Mom could be here with us! TX XOXOXO

Praise also to God FOR ALL OF YOU! Your support continues to amaze us every day. We love just knowing all of you are here with us.

CLOSING THOUGHT
Please do not be afraid of our family. I know Gary's cancer hits very close to home. I am sure most of us do not know many people Gary's age who is facing this struggle. I do not want any of you to think that by being near us or standing by us that this will happen to you. I know to many of you that might seem silly but I do know that sometimes people feel like that.
Enough said and time for bed!

Ciao and lots of love coming your way every day! BE POSITIVE AND THANK GOD IN EVERY CIRCUMSTANCE. He will show you the good in every unfortunate situation. You just have to look for it!
Lisa