Love, Loss and Life

Gary would be very proud of the boys. I am super proud of the boys. The boys are amazingly wonderful. They are handling Gary's death better than I could have ever imagined. We have our rough times. Throw downs. Anger. Frustration. Sadness. All the emotions that go along with grieving the loss of a father. I can't even begin to imagine what the boys are going through. My loss is very different than their loss.

I stand 100% firm in everything Gary and I did to prepare them for Gary's eminent death. We involved them in every single aspect of his dying and death. We never lied to them. I think we did a great job preparing them for what we are going through right now and it shows.

They are doing well in school. They are doing well at home and they are so loving toward me. Remember, they have their moments and maybe a few more than most kids on some days but if you take a look at the entire picture it is looking pretty rosy so far! Your prayers are working!

I ordered a stand up punching bag with gloves that I will put in the garage. Anytime they struggle with anger I will send them out to the garage for some bag time. It will be healthy for them to take that anger out and do whatever they want to that bag. It will be a great outlet for all of us. I could have used that bag this morning and with the amount of anger I had I think I would have ripped it and thrashed it.

My debit card was stolen out of my wallet at the baseball field on Tuesday at 4:45 PM. I had no idea until yesterday at 3 PM. I called Chase to report the card stolen and found out that the thief had charged about $500.00 on that debit card (they used it as a credit card but it is directly linked to my checking account).

I had the person at the bank shut the card down and off I went so I thought.

I decided to call this morning to see if the pending transactions had posted so I could file the dispute and get my money back. Get this - the lady on the phone the day before DID NOT cancel the card and the flippin' thieves charged thousands more and basically drained my account! Unbelievable. I was beyond upset as you can imagine and many of you may have already been through what I am going through.

So, inlue of kicking the crud out of the punching bag I don't have yet, I decided to go to the golf range and learn how to hit some balls and work on my swing. I had the greatest time with Jenn and then we even had a few minutes of social time on the porch. I was very relaxed and I would say I was in a great mood.

Then, back to the bank to get everything straightened out in person. I talked with the Branch Manager and they are putting a rush on getting that money back. We went over all of the charges to determine which ones were mine and after figuring all of that out I felt much better and assured that I would get that money back.

So annoying. I have to call so many companies that I pay online and change the card number. Ugggg......Oh well. Things could be worse.

School starts for me in a few weeks. I am excited and anxious to get through the nursing program so that I can begin to help people.

Church is great and we are having church out on the field at the school this week. We are having a huge kickball tournament with parents and kids alike and it should be super fun! God has done some pretty amazing things in our church body and I am living proof of that. Our church and our friends and our family have been such a huge support and without all of you we would not be where we are right now.

Life lessons learned the past few days: Anger is nasty and ugly. It is not good for your soul. Some people aren't worth the energy required to stress or be angry. There are so many awesome things in life to focus on. Find the positive and ditch the negative. Be real. Two-faced people have issues and they aren't yours. Ditch your insecurities. Surround yourself with people who want only the best for you. Pray more. Place all of your trust in God. Get in the passenger seat because no matter how hard you try you will never be in control.

Each day we can learn. Each day is filled with new experiences. Live with LOVE. Live through LOSS. Live your LIFE to the fullest.

Hugs, Kisses and Love,
L